Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Episode 2

The AKAs have gone out for a sister's night out at Pharoahs. The AKAs from Ahpla University meet with the AKAs from Amgis College. But no one was prepared to meet with MONA FERGUSON who has announced that she is back.

SYLVIA - If one more AKA comes through that door, we'll have enough for a chapter meeting! Ha ha ha ha ha!

OCTAVIA - If one more AKA comes through that door, I'm goin' home! I can't take much more of yall! Ha ha ha!

(Everyone turns around as they hear an even louder Skee Wee.)

JUNE - Wow! That was a powerful skee wee! Who the heck was that?

(The soror with the loud voice steps through the crowd and up to the table with her pinky in the air.)

MONA - Skee wee sorors! I'm back!

(SYLVIA, JUNE, OCTAVIA, and SHAREESA stare speechless at MONA.)

RENEE - Hello Soror! I'm Renee.

MONA - Hello Renee, I'm Mona. Mona Ferguson.

(RENEE stands and hugs MONA who never takes her glance from the Ahpla AKAs.)

HOLLY - Hi Mona, I'm Holly.

(Each AKA from Amgis introduces herself to MONA and hugs her. MONA then grabs a chair and pulls it up to the table.)

SYLVIA - Mona...um...I thought that you were...uh...transferring schools or something. The last time I heard you were...leaving.

MONA - Well you know me. I missed the chapter too much so I decided to...change what happened and come on back to Ahpla.

(SYLVIA looks over at JUNE.)

RENEE - Oh that's beautiful soror! I wish all sorors thought like you!

MONA - Yeah...me too.

OCTAVIA - Excuse me yall.

(OCTAVIA gets up and walks away.)

MONA - There's also a few people that I didn't get to say goodbye to properly. I gotta make sure I visit them and check on them. Just to show them that I care.

JUNE - A few people?

MONA - Nobody serious, just Jerrel...uh Jahanna, you know a few friends.

(JUNE looks at SYLVIA. MONA turns to SHAREESA.)

MONA - Shareesa, how's Gregg?

(SHAREESA answers but is not amused.)

SHAREESA - Gregg is fine. Just fine. Thanks for asking.

MONA - That's good. I haven't seen Gregg in a minute...not since I saw him over at my girl Caryn's new house. And that must've been about...oh...I guess I'd say two weeks ago.

SHAREESA - Two weeks?

MONA - Give or take a day or two.

(MONA smiles.)

SHAREESA - First of all...

AKINA - Oooh, sorors look! Look at that guy right there!

(Everyone turns to look at a bunch of guys, but one in particular.)

AKINA - Girls, now that is a healthy speciman of a man!

(Everyone laughs, SHAREESA doesn't smile but keeps her comments to herself.)

TRACEY - Oh yeah, he is fine! Damn!

AKINA - He must have all the girls fallin' all over his fine ass!

RENEE - Well get the list and add me to it!

(The AKAs from Amgis laugh. The AKAs from Ahpla are still a bit surprised, but play it off. SHAREESA is looking mad.)

AKINA - I'm saying, he's the perfect height! Tall and look at his arms. He can come from behind me and just wrap me all up.

HOLLY - Girl, you better quit talkin' crazy!

MONA - Look, his whole crew is walking this way.

(Everyone acts cool as the five guys walk past their table.)

RENEE - Okay, he is even finer up close. Good Lord!

(As soon as the music changes, they notice the brother turn around and walk

back toward their table with one of his friends.)

HOLLY - He's passin' by again! Somebody grab a camera! Ha ha ha!

(They all laugh as he approaches.)

TRACEY - Wait, he's coming right for us.

(The two guys stop at the table.)

MARCUS - Good evening ladies. Excuse me, would you like to dance with me?

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ALEXIS is in her room. She is thinking about how she saw BOBBY with PAULA together at Pharoahs.

ALEXIS thinks - Dammit! Why didn't I know that dating Bobby would include a lifetime of misery?

(ALEXIS takes another scoop out of her tub of ice cream.)

ALEXIS thinks - Why can't I get over him! I have never dealt with anything like this before! When me and Joey broke up in high school, that was no big deal. And I swore I was gonna be Joey's wife.

(She wipes her face. She's been crying.)

ALEXIS thinks - Even when I started to go out with Owen from the basketball team, that wasn't hard to leave. But this is crazy!

(She changes the channel in search of something good to watch.)

ALEXIS thinks - I thought I'd moved on. I have a wonderful boyfriend in Quinton. He is considerate, handsome, smart, caring.

(She stops on the Lifetime channel.)

ALEXIS thinks - He is everything I could ever want. So why did it shake me up so much to see Bobby with Paula? Damn!

(QUINTON smiles a big smile as BOBBY takes PAULA to the dance floor. He then turns to ALEXIS.)

QUINTON - You obviously didn't know about Bobby and Paula.

ALEXIS - Heck no. I didn't have a clue.

(silence)

QUINTON - You look bothered by it.

(ALEXIS looks at BOBBY and PAULA on the dance floor. BOBBY slides behind PAULA and playfully grabs her close by her waist. She slaps his hand as she laughs.)

ALEXIS - Naw, I'm okay.

QUINTON - Alexis, this is me you're talking to. You wear your emotions on your sleeve. You are bothered by this. Why can't you get over him?

ALEXIS - I can and I have Quinton.

QUINTON - Are you sure?

ALEXIS - Yes. I'm sure.

(ALEXIS pops out of her daydream, grabs her telephone, and dials.)

QUINTON - Hello.

(ALEXIS fixes her shaky voice from when she was crying.)

ALEXIS - Ahemmmm, hey.

QUINTON - Hi babe. What's up with you?

ALEXIS - Nothing much, how are you sweetie?

QUINTON - Fine. Just studying.

ALEXIS - Oh, did I disturb you?

QUINTON - Never. What's up?

(silence)

ALEXIS - Quinton, I wanna talk about what happened the other night. You know, the night that we went to Pharoahs.

QUINTON - Okay.

(QUINTON takes a deep breath.)

ALEXIS - I want to apologize if I ruined your night.

QUINTON - You didn't ruin my night. What are you talking about?

ALEXIS - Well you mentioned that I looked like I was hurt and surprised to see Bobby there with Paula. And I know that we have had issues with him in the past. So I apologize if I reopened an old wound.

QUINTON - Yeah but I thought we discussed that at Pharoahs. You said that you were over him, and I believe you.

ALEXIS - That's true.

QUINTON - Alexis, this is the deal. I know it isn't always easy to run into an ex boyfriend or girlfriend. Especially in this situation because Bobby and I are frat brothers. So I understand that sometimes it can be difficult.

ALEXIS - But what I'm saying is it's more than that Quinton. It isn't that I don't like running into Bobby. I could care less about that. With this situation, it's moreso who he is dating right now. Here I am trying to learn the history and get to know the ladies of Sigma Gamma Rho, and he is now dating one! Out of all the women on campus, why Paula?

QUINTON - Because Bobby has already been with every other woman on campus. Paula is the last one left! Ha ha ha ha!

ALEXIS - Not funny.

QUINTON - Sorry hon.

(silence)

ALEXIS - Quinton, how am I supposed to pursue Sigma if Bobby is dating Paula?

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At Pharoahs, the extremely attractive MARCUS has just approached the table of AKAs.

(MARCUS and his friend stop at the table.)

MARCUS - Good evening ladies. Excuse me, would you like to dance with me?

(Everyone looks at RENEE for her response. That is who MARCUS held his hand out to.)

RENEE - Sure, I would love to dance.

(RENEE smiles coyly as she takes his hand.)

JAY - Pardon me, would you like to dance with me?

(MARCUS' friend extends his hand out to JUNE.)

JUNE - Uh...sure.

(JUNE gets up and JAY follows her in the direction that MARCUS and RENEE just left.)

HOLLY - Fine and with manners! Damn!

RENEE - What did you say your name is?

MARCUS - I'm Marcus. And you are...

RENEE - Renee.

MARCUS - Pleased to meet you Renee.

(MARCUS imitates bowing as if for a queen. RENEE laughs.)

RENEE - You don't have to do all that. A simple handshake would be fine.

(MARCUS smiles and shakes her hand again.)

RENEE - You're a comedian huh? Ha ha.

MARCUS - Naw, I just like to have a good time. And I like the way that you smile so I thought that if I keep cracking jokes, you'd keep smiling.

RENEE thinks - Damn!

(She smiles again.)

MARCUS - See! See, there it is! There it is again!

RENEE - Stop before you make me blush!

(They both laugh.)

MARCUS - So do you go to Ahpla? I don't remember ever seeing you before.

RENEE - I go to Amgis.

MARCUS - Oh okay cool. You like it over there?

RENEE - Oh I love it. My brother goes to Amgis also. He plays basketball.

MARCUS - Oh okay cool. I'm an Ahpla man myself.

(MARCUS imitates as if he is adjusting a tie that he is wearing.)

MARCUS - You know, us Ahpla men enjoy the finer things in life.

(MARCUS speaks with a funny British accent.)

RENEE - Ha ha ha ha! Yeah right! Some of yall Ahpla students are ghetto! I saw one girl going to class with curlers in her hair!

MARCUS - Ha ha ha! No you didn't!

RENEE - Well, maybe I didn't but I wouldn't be shocked if I did! Ha ha ha ha!

(They both laugh.)

MARCUS - Oh wait! That's my song right there!

(The song, I Need a Girl, by P Diddy is played.)

MARCUS - This jam is hot!

RENEE - But it sounds like he's begging! Puffy and J Lo need to quit puttin' their business in the street!

MARCUS - Hey, a good girl is worth begging for. I would've begged for you to dance with me if you had turned me down.

RENEE - No you wouldn't have! You would have rolled right to the next girl!

(RENEE smiles.)

MARCUS - No seriously, I wanted to dance with you. I saw you as soon as I came in. You and your friends, but you stood out to me. So me and my boy approached yall.

RENEE - Well that is very sweet. I'm glad that you did.

(RENEE smiles at MARCUS and they continue to dance until the song ends.)

MARCUS - I don't know about you, but I've worked up quite a sweat. Would you like something to drink?

RENEE - Yeah sure. It is hot in here. Tell ya what. Let me run to the bathroom and I will meet you at the bar in about five minutes.

MARCUS - Okay that's fine. What do you want me to order for you?

RENEE - Um, if you can get me a cranberry juice, that would be great. Let me grab my purse.

MARCUS - Please Renee, it's on me.

RENEE - No but I can...

MARCUS - It's fine. It's my pleasure, it's on me. Now go ahead so you can hurry back.

(RENEE smiles at MARCUS and then turns to walk to the bathroom. She stops at the table to get her bag and HOLLY goes to the bathroom with her.)

MARCUS - Yeah, let me get two cranberry juices please. Thanks man.

(MARCUS bops his head to the music as he waits for the juices. He is surprised when someone taps him on the back.)

MARCUS - Hi.

MONA - Hey. I'm Mona, Renee's soror.

MARCUS - Soror? She didn't mention that she's in a sorority. That's great, which one?

MONA - Alpha Kappa Alpha.

MARCUS - Cool.

MONA - That's how Renee is. I love that girl to death. She is so humble.

MARCUS - She seems very nice. And she does seem modest.

MONA - Oh she is. She really is. You have to almost interrogate her to get any information out of her. She is tight lipped!

(MONA imitates as if she is using a key to lock up her lips.)

MONA - All the info is locked in on Renee! Ha ha ha.

(MARCUS laughs.)

MONA - Perfect example, she didn't tell you that she's an AKA right?

MARCUS - Right.

MONA - Ha ha ha, that's what I mean. And I bet she didn't mention that she's pregnant either huh?

MARCUS - She's what!

MONA - Oh yeah. She's pregnant. But don't worry, it's real early in the pregnancy. It's okay for her to dance. It won't hurt the baby.

(silence)

MARCUS - Um...what did you say your name was again?

MONA - Mona.

MARCUS - Right. Mona, can you do me a favor?

MONA - Sure I guess. What?

MARCUS - Um...can you tell Renee that I had to run? I just thought of something really important that I was supposed to do that I never got around to.

MONA - Okay, no problem.

MARCUS - Thanks Mona. Thanks a lot!

(MARCUS turns and leaves.)

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RONNIE and DEXTER are at the Omega house watching the game.

DEXTER - I told you the Lakers were gonna do it!

RONNIE - Yeah man shit! Can't nobody handle Shaq for real.

DEXTER - Hey, hand me another slice of pizza.

(RONNIE reaches over and gives it to DEXTER.)

DEXTER - Thanks.

RONNIE - Man, I'm bored. Now that Ty crossed, I aint got nobody to fuck with.

DEXTER - Ha ha ha ha, that's your problem nigga. You're a hazer! If there aint nobody to haze, you aint got no life! Ha ha ha!

RONNIE - That's true! Ha ha ha ha!

DEXTER - If you want, I can run to the yard and dig up some candidates for next year.

RONNIE - Could you? Thanks!

(They laugh again.)

DEXTER - Where's your girl? Her crazy ass usually keeps you real occupied.

RONNIE - I don't know what she's doing tonight. Usually when the game is on she leaves me alone.

DEXTER - Wow, what a wonderful concept! Ha ha ha!

RONNIE - What's up with you man? When you gonna get a woman?

DEXTER - I don't know man. These women at Ahpla just aint doin' it for me anymore man. For real.

RONNIE - Man whatever. I think you're still upset.

DEXTER - What? Over Willie? That was a long time ago man. A real long time ago.

RONNIE - And you aint dated nobody since. Matter fact, you aint had none sense!

DEXTER - Ha ha ha! Whatever! Willie and I have both moved on. She's doing her thing, and so am I.

RONNIE - Whatever you say dog.

DEXTER - Nigga I hate you!

(They both laugh.)

RONNIE - So now we aint got nobody on line, basketball season is all of a sudden over...man it's about to be boring up in here! Damn!

DEXTER - Bruh, you need a hobby!

(They eat the rest of the pizza and watch the post game highlights.)

RONNIE - Yo, what's up with us trying to throw a party for Ty?

DEXTER - Good idea. We haven't done a party in a while.

RONNIE - This shit could be off the chain too. We can plan that shit for the third Saturday. Like two weeks from now.

DEXTER - You think that's enough time?

RONNIE - Yeah. We won't need to publicize that much because it will be an Omega going over party. Just the title in itself will draw mad people. Ya know?

DEXTER - True true.

RONNIE - Ty has friends that want to congratulate him. I'm sure the Deltas will come out. It'll be packed up in here.

DEXTER - Cool. Call that bruh and let's tell him.

RONNIE - Aight.

(RONNIE gets up and goes over to the phone. He dials TY.)

TY - Hello.

RONNIE - Yo what's up baby bruh!

TY - Roooooo! Roooooo! What's up ExeQUEtioner!

RONNIE - Chillin bruh! What's up with you?

TY - Man just hangin' out!

RONNIE - Me and Dex are over here talking about a going over party for you over here at the frat house.

TY - Word?

RONNIE - Yeah we're thinking on the third Saturday. So you gotta make sure ,you tell all your peeps that might want to congratulate you. You know, all your fans.

(TY laughs.)

TY - Okay cool!

RONNIE - We'll take care of the rest.

TY - Thanks!

RONNIE - No problem man...oh wait hold on, my other line is ringing.

(RONNIE clicks over.)

RONNIE - Hello...hey what's up...yeah...yeah...huh? What? You are lying!

(DEXTER looks over.)

RONNIE - Are you serious! Hell yeah!

DEXTER - Who is that?

RONNIE - Aight cool! Cool! Later!

(RONNIE clicks back over to TY.)

RONNIE - Ty, let me hit you right back.

TY - Okay bruh. Peace.

RONNIE - Later.

(He hangs up.)

DEXTER - What was that all about?

RONNIE - Our night just jumped one hundred points on the excitement scale!

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ALEXIS is on the phone with QUINTON discussing her feelings toward BOBBY dating a member of Sigma Gamma Rho sorority.

ALEXIS - Quinton, how am I supposed to pursue Sigma if Bobby is dating Paula?

QUINTON - Well for one thing, who knows how serious Bobby is about Paula or any other female for that reason. He isn't one hundred percent honest with her from the door because she didn't even know that you and Bobby had a history.

ALEXIS - That's right. She asked me if I knew Bobby. But if he had told her that we used to date, she wouldn't have asked me that.

QUINTON - Right. So who knows what other misconceptions he has led her to believe.

ALEXIS - And maybe if she finds out that we used to date, maybe she won't be interested in him.

QUINTON - Maybe not. That's a good point too.

ALEXIS - So maybe I am worrying for no reason huh?

QUINTON - Well I wouldn't say that. I mean, it's a legitimate concern. If you are going to be pledging, that is something that will bother you twenty four hours a day. It will be in your face constantly.

ALEXIS thinks - Yeah, it will!

QUINTON - So I understand. I don't think I would want to deal with that either.

ALEXIS - Really?

QUINTON - No, I wouldn't. And I pledged already so I know what is in store for you if you make line. It aint pretty. Ha ha ha.

ALEXIS - Thanks a lot!

QUINTON - Ha ha, I'm just playin' baby.

ALEXIS - And you know this has nothing to do with you right?

QUINTON - Yeah, I believe you. Like I said, I pledged. I understand.

ALEXIS - You are the best baby. You are so understanding.

QUINTON - Thanks. You know I care about you.

ALEXIS - I care about you too hon.

(silence)

ALEXIS - Well listen, I know you're studying...

QUINTON - Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Ha ha ha.

ALEXIS - Well get back to it and call me later okay?

QUINTON - I will.

ALEXIS - Are you coming over tomorrow?

QUINTON - Yeah.

ALEXIS - I can't wait to see you.

QUINTON - Same here.

ALEXIS - Good luck studying, talk to ya later.

QUINTON - Thanks baby. Bye.

(They hang up.)

ALEXIS thinks - If only it was that simple. It bothers me that Bobby dates Paula because of Sigma Gamma Rho. But is that really the only reason?

(ALEXIS picks back up her tub of ice cream which has melted a little.)

ALEXIS thinks - Damn.

(She eats another scoop of ice cream.)

ALEXIS thinks - Imagine if I was actually on line. Really on line for SGRho! How in the world would that play out?

CANDACE - You know it's cool with me. I'm partial to Alphas.

(CANDACE smiles.)

ROSALIND - True that.

PAULA - Okay cool. I'll invite them in.

(PAULA leaves the room.)

CANDACE - Aurora number one!

(ALEXIS runs over to CANDACE and stands at attention.)

ALEXIS - Yes Big Sister Alpha Rhomeo!

CANDACE - You understand we are bringing upstairs a few friends to see you. Make sure you know all of your information because they might start testing you. You always want to make a good impression on visitors because sorors talk you up so much. We are very proud of you. So don't be nervous, just remember everything that you learned. You'll do fine.

(PAULA comes back in. With her she has LARRY, JASON, REGGIE and BOBBY. Her and BOBBY are holding hands.)

ALEXIS thinks - Oh my God! The Alphas! Bobby!

REGGIE - Hello ladies. Hey Candace, thanks for inviting us up.

BOBBY - Yeah, thanks baby.

(BOBBY kisses PAULA on the cheek and then walks directly over to ALEXIS. He gets in her face.)

BOBBY - Hi Lexie. Ya miss me?

(ALEXIS is awakened from her day dream by dropping her ice cream onto the floor.)

ALEXIS - Oh damn!

ALEXIS thinks - You know what? Enough is enough!

(She picks her phone back up.)

ALEXIS - I hate that I'm about to do this!

(She dials.)

BOBBY - Hello?

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RONNIE has just received a phone call and is now very excited.

(RONNIE hangs up.)

DEXTER - What was that all about?

RONNIE - Our night just jumped one hundred points on the excitement scale!

DEXTER - What? How? What happened?

RONNIE - That was Chris the Delta. She said something about she is bringing some girls over here for us to have some fun with!

DEXTER - Some girls? Like some pyramids? Some pledgees?

RONNIE - Yeah!

DEXTER - Dude, she was fuckin' with you. They don't have a line on right now.

RONNIE - How you know?

DEXTER - Because if they had a line on, don't you think we would have heard from the day the line started? You know that's how we get down with the sorors.

RONNIE - Maybe they changed the agenda this year.

DEXTER - Yeah right. They aint got no line on now. I'm tellin' ya.

RONNIE - Well I believe her!

DEXTER - No, you want to believe her because you want an excuse to haze somebody up.

(RONNIE laughs.)

RONNIE - No seriously, it didn't sound like she was joking with me. I really believe they got something going on and they are letting us in on it now.

DEXTER - Impossible. And I'll prove it to ya.

(DEXTER gets up and walks over to the phone.)

DEXTER - I'll find out once and for all.

(DEXTER dials.)

WILLIE - Hello.

DEXTER - Hey.

(WILLIE pauses.)

WILLIE - Hey. What's up?

DEXTER - Nothing much, how are you?

WILLIE - I'm fine. Um...I can't talk now though.

DEXTER thinks - Damn. I bet her man is sitting right next to her!

DEXTER - Oh that's cool. I just got a quick question for you.

WILLIE - Oh okay. What's up?

DEXTER - Do yall have a line on now?

WILLIE - Who us? No. You know the day that we officially start line we get together with yall. So no, we aint doin' nothing yet.

DEXTER - Okay, just checking. Well do your thing and I'll talk to ya later.

WILLIE - Okay. Bye Dexter.

DEXTER - Bye.

(DEXTER hangs up.)

DEXTER - Ronnie, Willie said that they don't have a line.

RONNIE - Really? That is mad weird! Why in the world would Christian call me and tell me that if it isn't true?

DEXTER - Maybe she's just jokin' with us.

RONNIE - Well I'm gonna pull her ass up about it if she still comes over!

DEXTER - As long as you haze somebody huh?

RONNIE - Naw, I just wanna get to the bottom of this shit.

DEXTER - Yeah, me too.

(DEXTER sits back on the couch.)

RONNIE - How's Willie?

DEXTER - She's cool. I didn't talk much to her. She was busy.

RONNIE - Oh.

DEXTER - Maybe you should try and call Christian back and see what she was talking about.

RONNIE - Yeah!

(RONNIE dials CHRISTIAN's phone.)

CHRISTIAN's ANSWERING MACHINE - Hi this is Christian...I'm not in right now, but if you'd leave a brief...

(RONNIE hangs up.)

RONNIE - She aint there.

DEXTER - Well maybe she is on her way over. But I'm sure she's just trippin'.

RONNIE - Yeah. Dammit I'm mad! I was gettin' in the mood!

DEXTER - Well if you must haze someone, haze Christian when she gets here. Ha ha ha!

RONNIE - Oh I will!

(The doorbell rings.)

DEXTER - Speak of the devil. That may be her.

RONNIE - Yeah I know. Now let's find out what's goin' on?

(RONNIE opens the door and sees CHRISTIAN standing next to a young lady who is blindfolded.)

RONNIE - What the hell...

CHRISTIAN - Don't use curse words in front of my girl.

(RONNIE is now confused.)

RONNIE - Come on in.

(CHRISTIAN grabs the girl's arm and leads her into the Omega house.)

DEXTER - Hey Chris.

(DEXTER and CHRISTIAN hug.)

RONNIE - Okay so explain what's going on here.

CHRISTIAN - Come on, let's go into the kitchen and talk.

(They go into the other room so that the young lady doesn't hear their conversation.)

RONNIE - What's this all about?

CHRISTIAN - Look, I'm the dean of the next line. I take this very, very serious. I know we aren't supposed to have contact with the girls, but I want them to be so tight that every now and again I step in and kidnap one of em. Then I drill her on being a good and perfect pyramid pledgee.

DEXTER - Wow, won't you get in trouble?

CHRISTIAN - Only if one of you guys tells Willie.

(RONNIE looks at DEXTER.)

RONNIE - Naw girl, we aint gonna say nothing. Promise.

CHRISTIAN - Okay good. So here's the deal. I got some errands that I gotta run. But in the meantime, I thought I could leave her here and you guys could...

(CHRISTIAN reaches into a plastic bag that she was carrying and pulls out a paddle.)

CHRISTIAN - ...tighten her up for me.

(CHRISTIAN smiles. RONNIE grabs the paddle.)

RONNIE - Now that's what I'm talking about!

CHRISTIAN - You can do whatever you want with her. If she cops an attitude, give her attitude adjustments!

RONNIE - Cool!

CHRISTIAN - Well have fun guys. And do whatever you want.

RONNIE - Cool!

(CHRISTIAN turns to leave.)

DEXTER - Oh Chris, one more thing.

CHRISTIAN - What's up?

DEXTER - You didn't tell us the pyramid's name.

CHRISTIAN - Oh my bad! Hee hee hee! Her name is...

(CHRISTIAN pauses.)

CHRISTIAN - ...Breanna!

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